Do you have ‘Imposter Syndrome’?

Do you have ‘Imposter Syndrome’?

Do you have ‘Imposter Syndrome’? Have you spent years and years and an absolute fortune on trainings/courses/advanced trainings/workshops/diplomas/programmes only to STILL feel that you are not quite ready to go out into the world and offer people a chance to try/buy your skills?  Do you think that you might be ready one day in the future when you have completed a few more programmes and trainings? If you answered yes to these questions, you may be suffering from ‘Imposter Syndrome’! You would not be alone. Many of the most world’s most talented and famous artists/writers/painters/actors/musicians/academics/scientists/leaders have struggled with this problem. Academy Award winner Jodie Foster told 60 Minutes she feared she’s have to give her Oscar back after winning best actor for The Accused. “I thought it was a fluke,” she said in the interview. “[It was] the same way when I walked on the campus at Yale. I thought everybody would find out, and they’d take the Oscar back. They’d come to my house, knocking on the door, ‘Excuse me, we meant to give that to someone else. That was going to Meryl Streep.'” Academy award winning actor Kate Winslet says fame doesn’t give you confidence. “Sometimes I wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot, and I think, I can’t do this. I’m a fraud,” she told author Susan Pinker. Chuck Lorre, writer and creator of hits such as Two and Half Men and The Big Bang Theory told National Public Radio that he needs to “go and hide”. “When you go and watch a rehearsal of something you’ve written and it stinks, the natural...
Do you PROCRASTINATE about promoting yourself?

Do you PROCRASTINATE about promoting yourself?

Do you PROCRASTINATE about promoting yourself? Do you hesitate to let people know about your business? Are you waiting to be ‘ready’ to put yourself out there? Are you secretly afraid of what might happen if you got clients/sales? For many, many years I was like that!  I was afraid that people would criticise me and my work, afraid that people would say I was rubbish and that I didn’t know what I was talking about, afraid that people would say I was ripping people off, afraid that people would hate me and be angry with me!  I was like this about teaching yoga, giving workshops, doing angel channelling for people and media coaching.  I know what it feels like! What was the result of my feeling this way? I hardly ever promoted my work. I only wanted close friends to come, no strangers! I was inconsistent about working. I made sure that my website had no sales message whatsoever, no call to action and no way to pay me! I regularly turned down clients. I hoped that hardly anyone would come to my workshops. Where did that get me? I was frustrated and broke and unfulfilled and envious of people who were successful in their businesses. So what happened? The change started with a decision. I decided that I wanted something different. I decided that I wanted to be successful. In order to do this, I needed to find out what was getting in my way. I didn’t know what I could do to fix the situation, so I worked with a coach to identify what my limiting...
Are you 100% CONFIDENT about promoting yourself?

Are you 100% CONFIDENT about promoting yourself?

Are you 100% CONFIDENT about promoting yourself? Sometimes we can be a bit wishy washy/wibbly wobbly about telling the world how great the stuff is that we are promoting?  Maybe this is because we are unsure of ourselves, or not quite convinced that we are good enough or that our stuff is good enough.    Maybe we have IMPOSTER SYNDROME, and we worry that if anyone looks too closely, they will see that we are rubbish!!!!!   If you go out in the world to promote your business, and you are unsure whether it is any good, if you secretly think it might not be good enough, you send out a very confusing message.   People sense your hesitancy and it makes it more difficult for them to decide to buy from you!  You don’t fully trust yourself, so why would they trust you?   I created my ‘Promoting  Your Stuff with Heart and Soul’ workshop so that we can pull out all those gremlins that are getting in your way, all the doubts, fears and limiting beliefs.    Once we know what they are we can dismantle and transform them into positive, clear, supportive and uplifting beliefs, beliefs that radiate confidence and purpose and certainty and let the world know that you mean business and that you are exactly what they need and want in their lives!   With this certainty and clarity, you can instil confidence in potential customers, they sense that you believe in what you are selling, and you transmit this confidence to them.   As well as working consciously with the old beliefs, we...
The very best guided meditations I have discovered!

The very best guided meditations I have discovered!

The very best meditations I have discovered! The world is FULL of guided meditations right now…..meditations for everything from attracting your soul mate to discovering your perfect career. It can be OVERWHELMING, trying to choose which ones to use!  So I thought I would share with you my absolute favourites, I have been doing these for more than 20 years and they are THE BUSINESS!!! Sanaya Roman and her partner Duane Packer are responsible for my learning to channel angels (via the lovely Lita Alberdi who trained with them)  I would even go so far as to say that they are responsible for my enthusiasm and excitement about the possibilities that life holds in every moment!!!! https://www.orindaben.com/pages/newsletters/2016_X65_align_relationships/ PS Schedule a FREE 30 minute Media Strategy Call with me to see how YOU can become media magnificent!...
What are your Money Blocks?

What are your Money Blocks?

What are your Money Blocks? Do you LOVE money, do you want more of it in your life?  Or do you secretly hate it, fear it and repel it???? The fabulous Breda Stackpool https://www.facebook.com/breda.stackpool?fref=ts  brought this possibility to my attention at her recent ‘Day out for your business’.  She told us all to take out some money and hold it in our paws and think about the effect it has on us.  Some people said they felt anxious (somebody cried!)  Not many of us were COMFORTABLE with the money.  So Breda suggested that we write a letter to money, telling it what we really think of it! I absolutely LOVE working with my angel channelling clients on identifying and releasing money blocks, because I feel strongly that our sense of self worth and our sense that we are worthy of money are linked, and when we get this, we suddenly feel a huge shift and become more magnetic to the money! I came across this list of ways that we attract money and ways that we repel it, from the wonderful guide Orin.  Well worth checking out!  www.orindaben.com Below is a summary of the qualities that attract and repel money. Close your eyes and think of a number between 1 and 42. Refer to that number on the list below.  For one day, work on developing the attracting quality of the pair below. If you notice yourself doing something that repels money and abundance, simply place a positive, attracting thought or action alongside the negative, repelling one. Honoring your worth and time/ Not honoring your worth and time. Giving...
Can you be TOO prepared for a media interview?

Can you be TOO prepared for a media interview?

Can you be TOO prepared for a media interview? One of the pitfalls that people fall into when preparing for media interviews (radio/telly/blogs/newspapers/magazines) is, believe it or not being TOO prepared!!! By this I mean having a rehearsed spiel that you have gone over and over and over, that you know off by heart and that you basically RECITE at the media whenever you get a chance. Politicians are ESPECIALLY good at this. But all kinds of people do it. You may have been around the circuit many, many times with the same story. Perhaps you have written a book, and you have talked about your book so much that you have developed a standard ‘story’ that you tell about it. Celebrities are often guilty of this. Bob Geldof is one of my all-time favourite people, but he definitely did it when I interviewed him for Vogue….I turned on the tape recorder and he started his speech, and barely stopped to draw breath.  When I read some other interviews that he had done on the same topic (Africa) I noticed that he was telling everyone the same stuff. Paolo Coelho also did it, when I interviewed him (I was disappointed!) The other day, I interviewed another well known writer (who shall remain nameless for now) and I felt that he was trying to do the same thing, just trying to tell me the prepared speech, telling me everything that was in the book.  When this happens, I work very hard at throwing in some questions that would surprise the person and force them to give me something new, something...
Have you had a VERY exciting sex life?

Have you had a VERY exciting sex life?

Have you had a VERY exciting sex life?  Have you had lots and lots of lovers? An open relationship?  Some interesting sexual quirks?  Do you look sensational in rubber? Jane Fonda is exceptional in all kinds of ways, her life so far has been action-packed and utterly riveting. At the age of 78, she claims that her life is only JUST BEGINNING and she has found love and success for the umpteenth time.   Because of this, Jane was on the cover of the Sunday Times Style magazine, posing in some sexy sequinned trousers and cool, pointy toed kitten heels, while inside the mag there was an 8 PAGE spread.  If you calculate what that publicity would cost to buy, you are talking hundreds of thousands of £s $s Euros, but you cant actually BUY that kind of publicity, because while most of us look at the pictures in the ads, we don’t give the information any credibility because we KNOW it is an ad.  When we read a feature, we identify with the human beings in the story, and we develop an emotional bond with them.  In the case of Jane Fonda, we may have been devotees of the Jane Fonda Workout (me) or we may have loved ‘Barbarella’ (me too) or we may have also married many times and always chosen men who liked to sleep with lots of other women (luckily not me!) However it is that we identify with Jane, we get more interested in whatever she is selling just because we somehow feel that we know her.  And that creates amazing brand loyalty, which...
Are You Holding Yourself Back with a Lack of Confidence?

Are You Holding Yourself Back with a Lack of Confidence?

This morning, I was feeling kind of rubbish. I mean really, really crappy. Physically, I have the flu and I feel knackered and run down. Mentally, I am going through a major wobble, a major ‘Why is this happening?’ dreading the future, thinking all the negative thoughts, thinking ‘What the F**K is going to happen to me? How will I survive?  Should I just try and get a job in a supermarket?  How could I ever think that I can be happy or successful?’ etc etc etc  Emotionally, I was just trying to walk to the coffee shop without bursting into tears, and just about managing it. Sometimes, life can seem really hopelessly messy. My life certainly seems really messy at times. And it doesn’t matter how many qualifications you have, how much therapy you have had, how much time you spend meditating, doing yoga and drinking wheat grass, life STILL gets messy……….or is that just me? When this happens to me, I figure I have two choices. One is curl up in a heap with Netflix and chocolate. Two is ask some useful questions.  Not ‘why is this happening?’ but more like ‘What could I do with this?  What can I learn from this?  How can this be better?  How can I see this differently?’ Today, I was very lucky because I had already arranged to have a life coaching session, and Fiona, my coach is such a gorgeous person that I already knew that just having her around would cheer me up. But Fiona did a lot more than just cheer me up. She made me see...
Inspiring others with your story

Inspiring others with your story

Inspiring others with your story One of the main reasons that human beings love stories is because they can help us to learn useful strategies for dealing with life’s many ups and downs and rocky patches.  When we are struggling with grief, or loss or money worries or health challenges or any of the many, many things that we struggle with……even just that thing of wondering if other people will think we are ugly or not good enough……we read stories about people who have MUCH bigger problems and challenges than we have, people who get through those challenges and tell us ‘Hey, I got through it and you can too!”.  These people’s stories are often featured in the media, and they can really lift our spirits when we are feeling a bit sorry for ourselves. One absolutely AMAZING and totally awe-inspiring story that I recently read was about a teenage girl from Syria called Nujeen Mustafa.  Nujeen is a refugee (she absolutely detests the word refugee, more than any other word in the English language, she says it means a second class citizen, someone that everyone wishes would go away).  She made the journey from war-torn Aleppo in her wheelchair on a rubber dinghy to the Greek island of Lesbos, and is now waiting for asylum in Germany. To help her with the sheer terror of the journey, she practiced breathing exercises that she learned from watching ‘Brain Games’ on National Geographic, which showed how feelings of fear and panic are controlled by the brain.  She breathed deeply and told herself over and over that she was strong. This amazing...
Should you shag a celebrity?

Should you shag a celebrity?

Is it a good idea to shag a celebrity, if you want to increase your profile in the media? The short answer is that there are two answers. The first is yes, it can really work wonders for your profile.  The power and influence of celebrity is such that anyone who gets into any kind of relationship with a famous person can become famous by association.  I should know! I have become well known as a result of having a famous partner (Shane Mac Gowan) and this has resulted in all kinds of global media exposure, including countless television documentaries, newspaper, radio, magazine and even prime time news interviews, and my personal favourite, a pop video directed by and starring Johnny Depp where I get to play his girlfriend and beat him up with my handbag. That Woman’s Got Me Drinking video. My profile has been raised enormously by this association. And we can all think of many, many other people who we might never have heard of, had they not been in relationships with famous people, however short or scandalous the relationships have been.  Think Monica Lewinsky, Rebecca Loos, Jesus Luz, Carlos Leon (Madonna) Soon Yi Previn (Woody Allen). Even people who are already relatively well known in their fields can go stratospheric when they hook up with someone who is already stratospheric.  We might never have heard of Amber Heard, had it not been for Johnny Depp, likewise Amal Alamuddin (now Clooney) John Mayer and Justin Theroux, Romain Dauriac (Scarlett Johansson). So the answer is yes. But there is another answer. You can get a lot of...
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